THIS, THAT, AND SALTINE CRACKERS…

Posted on December 20, 2007

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this. this is my sadness…

sunday (12/16), would have been my mom’s 58th birthday. robbed from her life, cheated from so many memories to come. i took a trip to nordstrom to calm myself, but found myself in tears on the way. they come so easy. so unexpectedly. so viciously.

this. this is my thankfulness…

i managed to call matt through my sobbing. after the initial “uh, baby, you really shouldn’t be on the phone, driving and crying”, he did his best to make me laugh, which he always manages to do so well. i told him i didn’t understand why it was still so hard. why sadness always comes when i think of my mom. i asked him when it would get easier. he told me “never”. and it’s true. the moment it gets easier is the moment that memories fade.

this. this is my happiness…

silly monkey won’t give kisses anymore. he won’t hug anymore either. i think we’ve hugged & kissed the buhjesus out of him, that now he’s retaliating. BUT… he’s talking more, fussing less, and growing into an amazing little boy. sure, he doesn’t like to eat dinner. sure, he has to splash his feet in the sink while he brushes his teeth. sure, he wiggles so much during diaper changes that poo smears just about everywhere. and sure, he grabs himself and yells “peepoo” most evenings. but, hey…he’s freakin’ adorable. i may be biased, but whatever. he is. my mom would SO love him right now.

this. this is my excitement…

i wanted to get a tmx (tickle me extreme) cookie monster for silly monkey, for xmas. i hadn’t b/c it was $35. a $35 stuffed toy that giggles & shakes. no thanks. i looked & looked & looked & looked and then gave up. i saw it go on sale for $30, then on sale for $25, but still passed. i figured silly monkey‘s gramps could give the same effect and that would be free. BUT… then i checked amazon, on a whim, i might add. tmx cookie monster… wait for it… $13.60… wait for it… with free shipping. so… silly monkey is getting a tmx cookie monster from santa.

this. this is my headache…

silly monkey’s new (super awesome) sitter has a son. this son has a cool dump truck. this dump truck has rad faux boulders. i had to have it. for silly monkey, of course. i found the truck at target and scooped it up. but suck, no boulders. so i emailed tonka. “dear danielyel – thank you for contacting tonka. we are sorry that you are unable to locate the tonka dump truck. they can currently be found out target, walmart and most toy stores. thank you for writing tonka. happy holidays.” hmmm… let’s try this again. so i wrote again, this time specifying that i want to stupid boulders & already have the rockin’ truck. “dear dayneille – the dump truck that was accompanied by the boulders is a limited edition toy that was released during the summer. they were only sold at smaller retailers and not larger department stores. unfortunately, the boulders cannot be purchased separately. good luck locating the limited edition dump truck. please let us know if you need any further assistance”. GOOD LUCK!? LIMITED EDITION!? WHAT!? it’s a toy. a kid’s toy. since when do people collect tonka dump trucks?! long story short, i ended up returning the non-super-cool no boulder truck b/c silly monkey’s new (super awesome) sitter found one for us. at kohl’s. apparently kohl’s is now a “smaller retailer”. i hate you tonka. wait… i take it back. i LOVE you tonka. and i am IN LOVE with your faux boulders.

this. this is my xmas spirit…

this dump truck was an obsession. i really did look everywhere for the one that came with the boulders. i also hate rude people. i don’t tolerate them. i won’t tolerate them. so scold me if you will (matt already did), but… i was at target and saw a dump truck (sadly, no boulders). one left. there was a lady in the same aisle, but just browsing – ie. not touching the dump truck. so… i grabbed the truck. PAUSE: please keep in mind that i already had the non-boulder truck. i was just checking out the box. PLAY: so i grabbed the truck and was then met with “I WAS GONNA BUY THAT!”. i turned around, looked at her and said “well, aren’t YOU in the xmas spirit”, which, again, was met with “I WAS GONNA BUY THAT!” i could have said more, shoved her, smacked the holiday cheer into her, but i didn’t. i just held onto the truck and walked off. i mean, seriously, i couldn’t give it to her. i cannot reward the rude. i put the truck in bedding.

this. this is my silliness…

today, i dared matt to eat 5 saltine crackers (one at a time), in under 1 minute. he swore he could do it, in fact he said “OK, that’ll be easy”. i told him i’d give him anything he wanted if he could. so… 1 minute later… 3 saltines left. HA! he tried again and made it through 1. he’s taking saltines to work tomorrow. so am i.

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