Posted on August 6, 2008


there should be a class on potty training.  not for parents.  for kids.  and it should take 8 hours and at the end of the 8 hours, the kid should be 100% potty trained.  there should be a refund if it doesn’t work.  similar to training for dogs b/c let’s face it, kids are kinda like dogs. 

i am seriously failing miserably at potty training.  while silly monkey boy will sit on the toilet, i have to bribe him – albeit stickers and gummy worms are cheap, they’re still bribes – to TRY.  i always said i would potty train when HE was ready, not when i was ready b/c seriously if this is how it’s going to be i will never be ready.  and after several months of doing this, i’m pretty sure he’s not exactly ready considering he usually tells me no when i offer to LET him use the potty. 

a friend of mine told me to put a ping pong ball in the toilet and have him aim at it.  she swore it wouldn’t flush.  apparently, i have some super toilets b/c the first try, it flushed.  the boy & i looked at each other dumbfounded.  he asked to try again and we did, though this time without flushing so now i have to fish the damn thing out after every TRY. 

and so he aims…

and he tries.  he tries so hard he poops.  on the floor.  while standing up.  trying to pee.  refusing to sit now b/c “mommy, booty is messy.  i make a poop.  on the floor. hahahahahahahahahaha.”

soooo NOT funny.  ok, maybe a little funny.