Posted on October 25, 2009


i don’t normally obsess about my age.  lately, though, with the big thirty repeat 29 coming up, i’ve been feeling like ughiamSOfriggin’OLD!!! 

on one hand, i feel super young.  i still have good hair & good skin and no one is buying me t-shirts that say “over the hill” or “old fart”, so young i am, right?  and when i’m in the store purchasing gross items that will eventually kill me, i get carded, even though i am well over 18, but apparently look nothing a day over 20 would show, or so the clerk told me today.  or sometimes 25, which is more the norm. 

but, still, young.  i look pretty darn young.  i got the aging gene from my mother.  she was 57 when she passed away and looked like she was in her 40’s.  the skin on that woman was amazing!  she almost never wore makeup, though when she did, it was a few coats of mascara to lengthen her short, straight, asian lashes.  and maybe some lip gloss.  in the form of chapstick.  so i feel lucky to be aging pretty gracefully.  even if i load makeup on my face in the form of concealer, foundation, bronzer, eyeliner, eyeshadow, mascara and the ever important smashbox o-plump… on most days, anyway. 

now, on the other hand, i feel a lot older than my extra 29 years.  life experience has added way too many years to me – stress, death, divorce, childbirth, illness and the ever dreaded white hair that i’ve been fending off for the past 8 years.  i’ve experienced bunches of “things” that people my age don’t normally deal with.  and perhaps it’s not extra age i’m feeling, but extra maturity.  i’m a grown up, dammit.  a full-fledged adult.  though i do still have the occasional penchant for laughing at fart jokes. 

so, in less than 2 months, i’ll catch up to most of my friends and hit the big 30 29+.  i wonder how bad it’ll be.  and i wonder if i’ll get kicked off 20-something bloggers.

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