THE WORLD EMBARRASSES ME, AND I CANNOT DREAM THAT THIS WATCH EXISTS AND HAS NO WATCHMAKER…

Posted on January 28, 2011

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i tend to do silly clumbsy things, often.  i fall.  a lot.  i hurt myself.  a lot.  but i can alwaysALWAYSalways laugh at myself.  a lot. 

there was that time i tripped over my own feet while bringing paperwork into my boss’ office.  as he sat there with a big time client.  i picked myself up.  laughed super hard.  and when asked if i was ok b/c “wow, that was really bad…”, i laughed again and said, “but very, very normal.” 

or that time i walked into a floor to ceiling window b/c i thought it was an open door.   oh… and then there was that time i spilled an entire glass of water down the front of my white shirt, in the middle of a busyBUSYbusy restaurant, after warning monkey not to spill his drink.  ha… and the one time i fell off the sidewalk, over a curb, into the street as i was doing nothing but standing (not even walking) – upon getting onto my feet, i didn’t even bother to look around to see who was staring (and not helping). 

i do a lot of involuntary stupid things (though i think we all do).  i just don’t really get embarrassed (save for the moments silly monkey chooses a busy store to scream and cry b/c i said noNOno to the nasty, artificial-ingredient laden box of cookies that he must HAVE NOWnowNOW and then never actually eats b/c they taste like poo!!).  i know how to laugh at my own silliness and misguided attempts at being normal. 

though today,  if i had done what she did – embarrassment would have crossed my face and tattooed itself into my forehead…

i dropped a friend at the bank this morning so she didn’t have to find a meter and trek a block.  as she walked out of the bank and passed my car, i couldn’t help but wonder… wtf is she doing?  logically, i thought, perhaps she was bypassing my car to walk to the end of the street and backtrack – yknow, b/c of the snow.  but no such deal.  she attempted to get into another person’s car! 

granted, THAT car was nearly identical to mine and the guy (who was apparently adorable) that was in THAT car was pleasant (though astonished), i still would have fallen dead on the sidewalk of major embarrassment.  instead, she laughed hysterically, apologized and power walked to my car.  and instead of swearing me to secrecy, she told some gals in the office to ask me what happened. 

and when they did, i told the tale.

** post title – voltaire

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