WHEN YOUR MOTHER ASKS, “DO YOU WANT A PIECE OF ADVICE?”, IT IS A MERE FORMALITY. IT DOESN’T MATTER IF YOU ANSWER YES OR NO. YOU’RE GOING TO GET IT ANYWAY…

Posted on March 25, 2011

0


a friend of mine posted this to his facebook page last night.  my comment?  “i miss my mom.”

…At 3 yrs “Mommy, I love you”. At 10 yrs “Mom whatever.” At 16 yrs “My Mom is so annoying.” At 18 yrs “I wanna leave this house.” At 25 yrs “Mom, you were right.” At 30 yrs “I wanna go to Mom’s house.” At 50 yrs “I don’t wanna lose my Mom.” At 70 yrs “I would give up EVERYTHING for my Mom to be here with me.” You only have 1 Mom. Post this if you love and appreciate your Mom!

the thing is…

at age 3, i adored my mom.  at age 10, she was the coolest person i knew.  at 16… ok, at 16 she was annoying.  when i was 18, i moved back home and my mom asked no questions b/c, yes, she was right.  at age 25, she was still my best friend.  at 26, i cried nearly daily that i didn’t want to “lose my mom”.  at age 27, i lost her.  and at every age after that, i have said “i would give up everything for my mom to be here with me.” 

on my way to work monday morning, i burst into tears.  i had just given silly monkey a kiss after dropping him at school.  nothing specific provoked it.  it just happened and i couldn’t control it. 

maybe it’s that his birthday is fast approaching.  in just a few short weeks, monkey will be 5.  FIVE!  and i can hear my mom’s voice chirping in my head to make a bigger cake, invite more kids, buy more presents and just stop worrying that everything won’t turn out perfectly.  i can picture her ecstatically packing up goodie bags and giddily wrapping the fifty thousand gifts she would have gotten for monkey.  i can imagine her laughing… but i can’t hear it. 

i miss that woman every moment of every day.  i can look back on my life with no regrets b/c i know what love looks like and how it feels.  but it doesn’t mean that i don’t wish every moment of every day that she was still here – laughing and joking and telling me that i’m a funny, funny girl.  b/c lately, i just don’t feel funny.  right now, i just feel sad. 

 ** post title = erma bombeck

Advertisements